You may have a piece of you inside that you constantly try to hide or make sure that no one sees ever or maybe even once again. The “darkest” part of you. This may be mistakes you’ve made in the past, or a person you used to be, or something along those lines. This is what my counselor had to say about that this week. 

We have to honor that part of us. How do we do that? We first must recognize what that is. If you’re like me, you may have an idea that there is this “villain” inside of you trying to come out and you’re spending all of your thoughts and efforts into making sure it doesn’t come out. That is the first mistake.  It’s not a villain. It’s a part of you that was never recognized. 

For me personally, it’s a scared little girl who craves love, attention, and acceptance. The “villain” comes into play when I go about doing anything and everything to obtain those things. 

There is a movie on Netflix called Stutz. I believe every single person should watch it. It’s Jonah Hill and his therapist talking all about this process of therapy and I instantly thought of a certain scene while talking to my counselor about this. They referred to this as the shadow. The part of you that you wish you were not, but can’t seem to get rid of. The therapist goes on to say that a way to get rid of the negativity that comes from neglecting your shadow is to talk to it and ask how it feels about who you are now. Are you proud of yourself? Are you disappointed with who you’ve become? What can you do to make up for neglecting that part of you? 

During my personal journey I believe that starting to accept myself in the ways I want other people to accept me is a major way I can make up for neglecting that part of me. You may relate to that, you may not. Love myself the way I crave others to love me. Wowza isn’t that hard!?

Another meaningful thing my counselor said was to start talking to yourself the way you talk to your friends. This doesn’t mean like have conversations with yourself, but hey if that works do it. But if you wouldn’t call your friend stupid or evil or the worst person ever, don’t think of yourself that way either. Be as positive about yourself as you are about your loved ones. 

The point of this post is to encourage you to think about what that part of you is at the root. Why do you do things that you may not be so proud of? Once you come to terms and recognize that part of you, you can start the healing process and ensure that the “villain” inside does not hold the power, you do. And you did all along. Remember, become fully known from within first!