I know we’ve all heard stories of people saving themselves until marriage and although it might not be too common nowadays, most people still believe it is a beautiful thing to do it that way. Many people even respond in amazement like “Wow! you saved yourself until marriage?!” Well what if I told you I not only saved myself, but I also saved my very fist kiss until marriage?
When I was in the 6th grade I made the personal decision to honor the Lord and save my virginity until the day I got married. As I grew a little older I heard the Lord speak to me, He asked me to save my very first kiss until marriage too. Crazy, I know! My mom and I thought so too, but I knew in my heart this was from God. Although I wasn’t sure why He was asking me to do this, I made this promise to Him anyway.
Straight out of High School I joined an internship at my church and for the next two years I dedicated my whole life to serving the Lord and building my relationship with Him. During that time period I met the man of my dreams, Benjamin Joseph Flores. He was the most gorgeous man I’d ever seen and let me tell you, he was definitely one of my heart’s desires. However, I knew I was in a season of my life where I needed to focus on only Jesus and wait for God’s timing on everything else. What is it easy? Absolutely not.
Fast forward a couple of years…Benjamin and I had built a friendship and became good friends, but I had given up any hope I ever had of one day being with him since he never showed any sign that he was even interested in me. Oh, but thank God for amazing friends and for His goodness and perfect timing.
There are so many details to this part of the story, but to keep it short one day Benjamin confessed to Angie that he had feelings for me! Ahhhh! When Angie told me, tears immediately streamed down my face and I felt something in my heart I had never felt before. I knew without a shadow of a doubt he WAS the one for me! This is when the fun adventure with my Benjamin began.
Turns out Benjamin liked me from the very first moment he met me just as I did. People?! He liked me for 3 years and didn’t say a word because he was also waiting for God’s right timing. How amazing is that!
We started dating shortly after and the way we decided to date is well, not common kinda like saving your first kiss is not common. I guess we’re just not common people haha, but it’s the way we felt the Lord leading us to do it. We were intentional to not make our relationship about anything physical. For a period of time we didn’t hug or hold hands; we were never in a house, a car or anywhere for that matter alone. We had some pretty strict boundaries. Some people thought we were weird and some people encouraged and supported us, but the things God showed me during the time that Ben and I showed virtually no physical affection is something I wish everyone could learn before rushing anything in relationships.
God opened my eyes and revealed to me why He asked us to have those specific boundaries. It was to show me what love truly is and how to truly love someone. Love is not taking or seeing what you can get. Love is not merely receiving. Love is giving.
God showed me how someone can love me without me having to give anything back. Benjamin would daily tell me how gorgeous, smart, kind and loving I was. He would shower me with words of love and life, not to mention the many things he did for me daily without expecting one thing from me in return. He didn’t expect a hug, a kiss, even a hand to hold. His motivation was pure LOVE. Benjamin showed me love just as Jesus loves, unconditional and without expectations.
The hand holding, hugging and the sweet kisses on the forehead came gradually as we felt it was right. Every step we took forward felt right and we enjoyed it very much. It was the most fun and beautiful experience to hold his hand or get a kiss on the forehead and just enjoy those simple affections of love and not feel the pressure or need to rush anything.
Fast forward 2 and a half years to the day I was to marry the man of my dreams, the man I introduced myself to 6 years before, the man I saved myself and my first kiss for…
It was the MOST magical day!
I felt like a princess! Disney music played everywhere, tears flowed and oh, the moment we kissed! It was a moment filled with cheers and celebrations from the people who love and supported us through our journey.
It was truly the perfect day!
As soon as Benjamin and I drove out of the reception we immediately started sobbing of pure happiness and unbelief at how amazing that day was. It was exceedingly, abundantly, above anything we could’ve ever asked!
I pray that as you read this you don’t feel like having a love like this is out of your reach. God was so good to me and i believe He wants to be so good to you too! We don’t tell people to do it the way we did it. It’s not a command in order for you to receive the best, but I know that for us, it was the way we were to do it. If you ask us, we will tell you to both follow the leading of the Holy Spirit and trusted spiritual leaders because that is the way YOU will receive the very best God has for you.
One thing I will say though is, Girls, NEVER settle for anything less than the man God has for you! He is coming, all you have to do is follow God and He will direct your path. He is a good Father; He has the best, hottest (Hallelujah) and most loving husband for you.
Don’t search him out, you were made to be pursued and always know that you are worth the world baby.